Self-checkout is an unpaid internship

Somewhere along the way I became a cashier. Nobody interviewed me. Nobody trained me. I just walked into the grocery store and the grocery store handed me a scanner and a small screen that yells at me.

Unexpected item in the bagging area. There is no unexpected item. The only item in the bagging area is the bag, which the machine has seen ten thousand times and still regards with suspicion. Then a light starts flashing and I stand there like a man who has robbed a bank with a bunch of bananas, waiting for the one employee supervising eight machines to come and forgive me.

If I am going to do the job, I would like the discount. Or at least a name tag.